BEHIND THE RESTRAIN

BEHIND THE RESTRAIN

O what lies beneath this wretched man I am? The grace of God that keeps me from acting upon the fierce intentions of my heart. The battle rages between the man that I am and the man that I am striving daily to become. This process of change is an endless pursuit that drains me of my motivation. Well kept and secure by the hand of God. May the day never come that I am unleashed, for in that day flesh shall have its victory. For how can that which has been shackled overcome that which has chosen to die to self? Ever so softly I take my stride to walk this path I must daily tread. Driven by an eternal destination that seeks to welcome me though undeserved.

O what lies beneath this wretched man I am? The grace of God that keeps me from being overtaken by a power that is desperately wicked. Keep me O God secure under your restrain. For without you I am nothing, and alone I cannot keep harnessed the lurkings of my heart. May I find you daily as I kneel before you that I may not stumble. May I often seek for your eternal treasures, so that I am not found wanting in my pursuits for temporal satisfaction.

AS I LOOK IN TO THE MIRROR TODAY, THERE IS MORE GOING ON BEYOND THE SURFACE THAN THE EXPRESSION WHICH BEAMS BEFORE YOU. GOD'S GRACE IS SUFFICIENT!

GLORY IN THE CREATOR

GLORY IN THE

CREATOR!!

How do I view creation? Do I stand in awe? Captivated in thought with things I have never seen. The splendor of such things causes me to sing. Creation is the music to the song of beauty which God created. The love that we share with one another is only a short breath of the love that God is. Peace is only a jewel of the true treasure that lies in its Creator. Is the creation of greater use than its Creator? For at some point, that which was created will lose its glamour, but does that rob it of its true value? That which is created lies prey to temporal sustenance. The Creator is eternal, for whether He is acknolwedged or not He shall not lose His glory. The Creator(God) is and always shall be. That which has no beginning or end is not bound by what man vlaues. When we glory more in creation than in its Creator; we lose sight of the true source of eternal substance and sustenance. Therefore leaving us as men who are forever wanting.

REVEAL ME

REVEAL ME

O God, the picture that I see that beams within my soul,

Shows a sinner and a servant seeking to be whole.

Reflections from your Word, reveal the man that I am,

The answers to my confusion when caught in a jam.

Release the facade from this body that longs to be real,

Soften my words to your ears as I make my appeal.

Mold me to your image that is holy and divine,

Strengthen me with your fruit that comes from your vine.

Caught in your mirror that is pure in its reflection,

Revealing my weaknesses and my sinful objections.

Let me stand as a man who is tried and undone,

Focused on you my God, the true Holy One!

UP! UP! UP! AND AWAY.....................

Greetings friends,
Just want to let you know that I have not disappeared. I apologize for the break in my writings and postings. I have been taking some time and taking care of some personal business. I am headed off to Colorado June 1st thru the 10th. I have lots of things in my head to write about. Just need to make the time to write them down. I hope and pray that all is well with you all. Take care and stay faithful!

TREASURE OF A MOTHER

TREASURE OF A

MOTHER.....

Not all treasures come in the form of silver and gold,

Some come as people, their names are untold.

There is a special person that to me is a treasure,

Being her son has been and is a priceless pleasure.

An example of love she has been all throughout my days,

I offer her my thanks, I offer her my praise.

She seeks to help others and meet their many needs,

A special woman she is, a precious jewel indeed.

Patience and love are with her in her ways,

God's wisdom and blessing are with her all her days.

She has been a faithful wife as well as a mother,

To whom does she compare, there is no other.

Smothered by her love and always her prayers,

Whenever I talk to her I know she really cares.

My motivation to achieve and do the things I should,

She encourages me to love others and do all that is good.

I see her not as unordinary or similar to the rest,

But an ordinary woman led by God that seeks to do her best.

There is so much more to cherish and always more to say,

As I reflect on my Mother today on Mother's Day.

The treasure of a Mother is a gift very dear,

It brings my thoughts to a pause and to my heart a joyful cheer.

Dear God, I thank you for my Mother for she is a special one,

I count it a priceless treasure to always be called her son.

WHO AM I TRYING TO BE?..................

O TO BE LIKE THEE ..............

O to be like Saul whose name was changed to Paul,

Known as an Apostle who consistently gave his all.

To jails he was not a visitor, to hardship he was not a stranger,

He stood bold as a lion when looking in the eye of danger.

O to be like Peter who walked with Jesus on the sea,

When the waves began to thunder, for the hand of Jesus did he plea.

He spoke with boldness and power on the day of Pentecost,

Proclaiming the gospel of Christ to the thousands that were lost.

O to be like Noah who worked on an ark for a hundred and twenty years,

He faithfully spoke redemption and warning to rebellious deafened ears.

The rain began to drop, the floods began to rise,

The door has been shut, can you see the fear in their eyes?

O to be like the Samaritan who is known for being good,

When he saw a desparate need, he went beyond the duty of doing what he could.

He opened not only his hand, but also his heart,

To help the wounded man, before he from the world did depart.

O to be like Enoch a man who walked with God,

His character was flawless, his testimonty wasn't a fraud.

He sought not that which was right in the eyes of wicked man,

But followed that which was according to God's master plan.

O to be like Esther, a captive who became a queen,

Her graciousness and beauty the king had never seen.

She forgot not her people when Haman sought their pain,

Her courage before the king kept them from being slain.

O to be like David though young he knew his cause,

He went forth to fight the giant, but not for man's applause.

A man though not perfect grew to play his part,

Remember as a man after God's own perfect heart.

O to be like Ehud a judge by God was he made,

He soon would deliver Israel by the crafting of a blade.

He took King Eglon a present, bodly before him did he stand,

He presented him with a dagger, not with his right but his left hand.

O to be like Daniel who purposed seriously in his heart,

To keep himself pure and from God's will not depart.

When thrown into the lions den looking danger in the eye,

He bowed his knee and heart to God who reigns supremely on high.

O to be like God, the one whom these people served,

Their homage, their obedience He graciously deserved.

He gave them knowledge and wisdom when they didn't know what to do,

Power and strength when battling wickedness in places higher than me and you.

He gave them discernment and direction when sinking in sin's sand,

Gave them a sense of hope, He guided them by the hand.

Why do we focus our eyes on others comparing ourselves to their level,

Not watching for the obstacles set out by the devil.

Why not raise our standard to be like our God above,

A flawless example of Grace and flowing agape love.

To be like thee O God, I pray I will strive to be,

Not settling for second best or the enemy of complacency.

PRELUDE TO EASTER # 5

THE RISEN LORD

Today a man named Jesus died upon this hill,

For a moment there was silence, my heart stood very still.

There were those that wept as He hung there on the tree,

Not knowing the significance, where they stodd was Calvary.

A common man named Joseph asked for the body of this man,

Not knowing what he was doing was part of the Master's plan.

He lay the body in a tomb covered by a stone,

Guarded by Roman soldiers where it was to be left alone.

The memories of yesterday are still fresh upon my mind,

Asking questions of the injustice, answers are hard to find.

The cross still stands firmly on the hill were Jesus died,

In my mind echoes the chant, to Him be crucified.

There is a silence in the air unlike that of yesterday,

To describe the contrast clearly, well it is hard to say.

Before Jesus died He promised He would rise from the grave,

His desire was to seek the lost that they might be saved.

Today I heard men talking, they were so full of pride,

They were still mocking Jesus who was crucified.

The anger grew within me, I didn't know what to say,

Dropping to my knees, I humbly began to pray.

Father please forgive me I know you're in control,

Forigve these men their foolishness, please save their souls.

It is now night, as I lay here in my bed,

Fearing the future of those men today after they are dead.

This morning I took a walk to the tomb where Jesus lay,

A delight to my eyes, the stone was rolled away.

The two soldiers were out cold lying on the ground,

An angel stood on the tomb proclaiming with joyful sound.

Jesus Christ is risen, He is no longer here,

Go and tell others, spread forth this joyful cheer.

The sting of death is stingless, the grave could not hold the King,

Sin's shackles have been broken, listen to the angels sing!!!

PRELUDE TO EASTER # 4

BLAMELESS !!!!!!

Unspotted, pure, and blessed from beginning to end,

He belongs to a realm which I cannot comprehend.

His eyes have partaken in wonders I do not know,

Feared by those on high and those referred to as low.

Earth is His footstool and the place which we live and rest,

Men bow down to Him and commit to Him their best.

Creation was the response of His spoken Word,

Man was the result of His living breath.

Broken for me that I might be mended from sin's grasp,

Lifted up in my place that I might be brought low.

PRELUDE TO EASTER # 3

EVIDENCE OF HIS

HAND.....

His touch is strong but loving. His hand is most powerful, but tender and comforting as a father to his child. His hand has moved mountains. He has also mended broken hearts. His hand has chastend, but has also encouraged. He leads me as a shepherd his flock with his staff. When I am in the valley He lifts me up to the mountaintop. When I fall in puddles of sin, He picks me up and sets me back on my feet. When I could not pay the debt of my sin, His hands suffered in the cruelty of the cost my my debt.

Can you see the evidence of his Hand? Look closer beyond the barriers of yourself and see His hand lead you through the storm. When you just missed the drunk driver while your family was fast asleep; did you see His hand? When your best friend after twenty three years gets saved; did you see His hand? Did you see His hand when your friend was diagnosed with that fatal disease? Did you see His hand when He took a love one to be with Him? If not, maybe you have not felt the grip of His Grace from His comforting hand that is constantly there.

When you can't see the positive, look for His hand. When you feel like you cannot hang on, reach for His hand. When your spirit is broken, feel the mending of His hand. When you feel hate and spite, experience the love and peace of His hand. When you don't know what to do, trust in the leading of His hand. When you question why you live for Him; remember the scars in His hands.

"For it is better, if the will of God be so, that ye suffer for well doing, than for evil doing. For Christ also hath once suffered for sins, the just for the unjust, that he might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh, but quickened by the Spirit:" (I Peter 3:17-18)

PRELUDE TO EASTER #2

THE CROSS

Searching for an anchor, grasping for a hold,

Trying to walk the path of life ever so bold.

The more I drift from this path, I am very quick to find,

God is the only one who gives me peace of mind.

When I am discouraged there is a place that I draw near,

It brings joy to my face a smile and to my heart a joyful cheer.

The shadow of this place is something I have never seen,

It brings soberness to your mind when you truly know what it means.

Where do I draw near when I suffer loss?,

It is a special place that I call the Cross.

The cross is a symbol of grace and of love,

A precious act of compassion from my loving Father above.

When I grow weary and find God's voice hard to hear,

I know a special place that I can always draw near.

PRELUDE TO EASTER #1

THE SHADOW OF THE

CROSS

As I travel this road of Christianity, what is it that keeps me going? No, the road is not always smooth. Storms of strain rain down on me. Winds of discontentment overtake me. I look at the shadow of the cross. I have seen joy and I have seen sadness; both at their highest peaks. I am reminded of the shadow of the cross. I have seen life fulfilled to its fullest. I have seen death rob others of their joy. I face the shadow of the cross. The Lord has given me more than I deserve. He has also taken away for my own good. I go forth by faith, Sometimes questioning why I do what I do. Yes, I remember the shadow of the cross. Where would I be without Christ? What if I did not have trials? Would I see my need for Christ? The corruptedness of this world at times is hard to bare. Why do I have to struggle with sin daily? I find strength when I think about the shadow of the cross. This road I travel I wish at times would end. I must go forward faithfully, and when weary; rest in the shadow of the cross. I know there is an end to this road I travel. I must focus on the One who is at the end of this road waiting for me.

What is the Shadow of the Cross? Why does it bring me joy? I'll tell you why. The cross of Calvary is bare. The One who once hung on it was my Lord Jesus Christ. That glorious day my Lord by the power of God defeated sin and conquered death. That is why I smile. That is why I keep going forth day by day trusting my Lord. The shadow which the Cross of Calvary shows is a picture that Christ is risen. It is a symbol to me of what my Saviour did for me and what He continues to do for me each day. He is not dead!!! He is alive!!

THE PROCESS.......THE PRODUCT

THE PROCESS........TO

THE PRODUCT.

Have you ever watched an old car that was totally rusted out for scraps get totally restored to a shiny smooth running machine? Have you ever been involved with restoring and fixing up an old run down house? Have you ever paused to take notice of the huge building that gets built up in a matter of months that you thought would take a year or more? Have you ever worked with a kid for a period of time and watched how he or she grows and changes in all sorts of ways? Have you ever been annoyed by the beginning pursuits of that young piano player who later plays sweet melodies of comfort? Have you worked with a sports team and watched how that team that had no chance of accomplishing anything; amazingly grow in leaps and bounds? Have you ever paused and reflected on what you were like five years ago? What you looked like five years ago? What you were like ten years ago?

All the things mentioned above took time. There was a PROCESS that had to take place before things were changed or accomplished. Before the finished PRODUCT was reached, it took a process of time, work, sweat, stretching of patience, endurance, thought, a plan, people, persistence, structure, pain, faith, commitment, etc..... In reflecting on these things, I am reminded of the PROCESS that is taking place in my life. The process of SANCTIFICATION. The process of God molding me, shaping me, stretching me, breaking me, conforming me, bending me, and making me more like Him. It is nice to know that God is working in me and through me, but all those things that He is doing do not always feel so good. How many times have I become frustrated because of the way the process shows its face in my life? (The unexpected trials that arise from day to day, certain people that cross my path, the answers I must wait patiently for that arise, seeking out God's will for my life, the battle between the flesh and the spirit, dealing with other people's problems, serving others, etc....) At times I must say that it is really really hard to stay focused on the fact that all the things I endure and experience are for a PRODUCT that I cannot see. God sees the finished work. He is the Master Craftsman of my life.

O the process of things can be so daunting and stressful at times. O the joy that comes when all the hard work and time we have put into something is revealed in the finished product. The process is forgotten in a way and we rejoice in and enjoy the accomplishment of the product. What joy it brings to our God when we rejoice in Him for what He is doing in our lives. Yes, the process will hurt and require of us more than we may be willing to give or endure. But the hope and certainity that we have is that God is Sovereign and He knows what is best for us. All that He is trying to do through us and in us is for His Glory. I can think of so many times that I have bucked against the process because I thought it was too hard or did not suit my desires. How quickly I forget that the God of the PROCESS is also the God of the PRODUCT.

Though I may change, my environment may change, my friends change, those around me change, my circumstances change........God and God's love for me never changes.

Today, may you be reminded that God is in control and that today He is actively working in your life. How will you respond to that today?

"Philippians 4:11-13(NASB) Not that I speak from want, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me."

AM I TRULY BEING REAL ?

AM I BEING REAL.......

(EPHESIANS CHAPTER ONE)

R elationship wih God. This is the most vital aspect to living a consistent Christian walk. If my relationship with God is not on a real leve, then all my other relationships are not going to be where they should be. Notice in chapter one of Ephesians how personal the Apostle Paul referst to God and Christ. Verse one, (I am an Apostle of Christ)(by the will of God). Verse two, (peace from OUR God). Verse three, (OUR Lord Jesus Christ). Verse seventeen, (God of OUR Lord). A person cannot talk this way without knowing someone very personally. As Paul corresponds with the Ephesians, he is not challenging them to strive for something he does not have. He is reminding them of what they have in Christ. What he has in Christ. Remember, he is writing this letter during a time of personal persecution and trial. Am I being real in all my relationships or am I still wearing a Mask?

verse 7, "In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of His grace."

E valuation of self. Am I being honest with myself? Do I live each day as if I would stand before the Lord today? Do I live a REAL Christian life in front of my peers or is it just a facade? Is my Christian life really Christian? Verse four, (just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before Him. Am I living obediently in Christ? Do I strive daily to live and think Biblically as I deal with the different tests and temptations that come my way?

A ttitude....Attitude...Attitude. IT IS NOT ALL ABOUT ME....IT IS ALL ABOUT HIM!!!! Paul makes it firmly clear in verse one why he is doing what he is doing and why he is saying what he is sharing with the Christians. Ephesians 1:1, "Paul and apostle of Christ Jesus BY THE WILL OF GOD. It requires a submissive attitude to be and live obediently to what God commands. In my effort to be REAL, have I realized that the things that I experience in my life that are not in my control are there to mold me and shape me more into the image of Christ? May I not get lost in focusing in the process, that I lose sight of the fact that God sees the finished product. Therefore, I must trust God that He knows best for my life.

L ove of God and others more than self!!!!! Do I love and long for the eternal things that God has to offer? Verse 18, " I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened, so that you will know what is the hope of His calling, what are the riches of the glory of His inheritance in the saings, Verse 19, and what is the surpassing greatness of His power toward us who believe."

Key things to consider as I seek to be REAL and SHARE my faith:

*My ability to influence others is directly related to what they think about me.

*What does it mean to enter someone's world but not take on his or her way of life?

*How can I become friends with non-christians without letting them influence me negatively?

*Think of some qualities of a helathy relationship: Okay, now are these qualities in my relationships with God, parents, friends, etc.......

A TIME FOR?...........................

A TIME FOR?..........

Ecclesiastes 3:1

"To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:"

What shall this day hold? I do not know. What circumstance awaits me later in the day? I do not know. What trial shall I face in my path today that will attempt to stretch my faith and make me question where I stand? I do not know. What response shall transmit from me today when someone or something requires from me an answer? I do not know. Will I respond in the flesh or in the spirit today when encountering unexpected circumstances? I do not know. Am I living today expecting to face something I have never been challenged with? I hope so.

Well, if you are like me, you probably forget from time to time that we are promised that we will face all sorts of things in this lifetime. The writer of Ecclesiastes warns those he is writing to that there is a place for all sorts of things under the heaven. In verses 2-8 of chapter three we are told there is a time for laughter, sadness, love, hate, peace, war, loudness, quietness, killing, healing, etc.... These are only a few of the many things that we will face in our lifetime. What about: losing your home, losing a family memeber, losing a friend, losing your job, conflict with friends, loneliness, bitterness, car accident, losing everything that you hold dearest to your heart. Maybe you have experienced some of these things are you know people who have.

We never know what may come knocking on our door of life any given day. These things are real. These things reveal to us if we are being real. If we are being real in our relationship with God. If all the verses we memorized and hymns we sing really do get beyond the cloud of our brain and get to the core of our heart. There are three things I would like to share from Ecclesiastes chapter three:

The first thing I would like to share is God's Promise.(Ecclesiastes 3:1) We are told that we will face all sorts of things while living in this temporary dwelling place. We are going to experience all sorts of emotions and circumstances that will bless us as well as sometime challenge us to our very core. We cannot control what we may encounter, but we do have a part in how we respond to those unexpected encounters.

The second thing I would like to share is God's Precious Handiwork.(Ecclesiastes 3:11, "He hath made every thing beautiful in His time: also he hath set the world in their heart, so that no man can find out the work that God maketh from the beginning to the end. The one question that eats at man each day is the question WHY? God, why did that have to happen to me? God, why did they have to endure that? God, why are you making me wait so long for an answer? God, why can't you just write on the wall your purpose and will for me? God, why am I still single? God, why did you take them so soon to be with you? The question of WHY lurks in my mind and heart each day. I am humbly reminded that God's Ways and Thoughts are much higher and greater than mine. I am humbly reminded that we were not created to know and understand all that God does, but to TRUST! Wow! That is so tough. We must take comfort in the fact that all that God allows, all that we have to endure, all that others around us endure; is part of His plan. Even if that means not having a clue of WHY. Of course, this is the toughest thing to acknowledge when you are the one having to go through whatever circumstance you are facing that crushes you.

The third thing I would like to share is God's Picture.(Ecclesiates 3:14, "I know that, whatsoever God doeth, it shall be for ever: nothing can be put to it, nor any thing taken from it: and God doeth it, that men should fear before him." I am still trying to swallow this thought again. The fact that the whole big picture of life is not about me, but it is ALLLLLLLLL ABOUTTTTTTT HIMMMMMMM!!!!!!!! The things that we experience in life are not there to turn us away from Him, but towards Him! God, how can something so tragic and heartbreaking turn me or them toward you? God, don't you think that they would follow you if you didn't put them through something so hurtful? God, I am trying to walk faithfully and serve you, but you keeping allowing these hard things to come into my life. Job, Job, Job Job!!! Job 2:10b, "What? shall we receive good at the hand of God, and shall we not receive evil? In all this did not Job sin with his lips." What in the world!!! Remember this is a man speaking who has just lost his ten children, his livestock, etc...except for his wife. Wow!!

SUMMARY: So, we are told that we should expect to face all sorts of challenges and blessings in our life. We have no idea when they will arise from day to day. So that requires TRUST. We are told that God has made it that we are not to know His work from beginning to end. Things are going to happen and we are not going to always have an answer for the WHY. We are also told that the things that God doeth, He does them not to turn us from Him but towards Him, so that men would acknowledge Him with a reverant, respectful perspective. So, we know that there is a time that we will face things that are going to challenge us to the deepest part of our being. We cannot control time or what time brings, but we know the God who does.

Today, may you be challenged as I am, to pray(pour yourself out to God), practice,(live out your faith), and pursue(seek God with all your mind, soul, heart). For today could be your day to face something under the heaven that you have never encountered before. GOD IS NEAR! GOD IS ALL POWERFUL! GOD IS OUR STRENGTH! GOD IS CONSTANT! GOD IS IN CONTROL! GOD IS EXACTLY WHAT YOU NEED HIM TO BE AND MORE WHEN FACED WITH WHATEVER COMES YOUR WAY....HE IS NEVER CAUGHT OFF GUARD.

WHAT MASK SHALL I WEAR TODAY?.....OR SHALL I BE REAL?

WHAT MASK SHALL I WEAR TODAY? .........

OR SHALL I BE REAL?

What mask shall I wear as I venture out into my day,

The attitude that matches and the role I shall play?

As I stared into the mirror this morning, O what did I see,

Am I ready to be REAL with a perspective based on eternity?

Was I pleased by the reflection revealed to me by God's Word,

Am I ready to go forth to battle like a soldier with his sword?

Do I tear down the facades that keep me from being real,

Are do I seek to maintain an image that is comfortable to others' appeal?

O this daily fight to be real before my friends and foe,

Will they except me as I am, I don't know.

The past masks in my closet mock me as a pretender,

O the prideful facades I must daily surrender.

Today, I go forth as who I am focused and real,

May God quickly correct me and my other masks reveal.

Today, I shall be real and crush the masks which I wish to wear,

For I must be real, I have a name to bare.

That name is Jesus Christ, my Saviour and Friend,

It is He today upon whom I must depend.

So if you are wearing a mask please remove it from your face,

Walk forth today in victory and bow before the throne of Grace.

IF THIS BREATH WERE MY LAST

IF THIS BREATH ...

WERE MY ..........LAST.

(A personal interrogation with self)

Tyararr, are you living in your temporal dwelling with an eternal perspective? Did you know that you maybe only have the next few days, hours, minutes or seconds? How much have you thought about God in the past few hours. Are you so full of yourself and priorities that you cannot acknowledge Him who made you and gives you a reason to exist and function? Do you long for heaven, or do you shy away in thought hoping to fulfill all your desires and wishes here first?

Tyararr, are you living in your temporal dwelling with an eternal perspective? Have you paused to count the blessings God has given you, or have you pondered only on what you do not have? Are you truly trusting in an All-Knowing God for an unknowing future? Are you being real with yourself as you reflect on God's Word, or do you hide behind vague answers? Why won't you let go of that which you keep clinging to? It is only temporal.

Tyararr, are you living in your temporal dwelling with an eternal perspective? Did you think about the fact that your last breath could have been seconds ago? Are you living based off of past victories, or are you growing and living for today? Was your last encounter with a brother in Christ a positive one? As you write this, are you truly pondering it and pursuing to apply this mindset daily?

Tyararr, are you living in your temporal dwelling with an eternal perspective? What testimony will you leave behind? What kind of message is your life representing for Christ? Is Christ your all in all? Are you ready to face the situations or unknown trials that await you? Are you allowing yourself to be daily bridled by the Hand of God, or are you bucking against Him for your wants? Have you pondered clearly the thought that: HOW I VIEW GOD AND WHAT I BELIEVE ABOUT GOD WILL DETERMINE HOW I LIVE MY LIFE.

Tyararr, are you living in your temporal dwelling with an eternal perspecitve? If this breath were your.................

WHEN THE MINISTRY CAUSES YOU TO QUESTION YOUR LOVE FOR IT....

WHEN THE MINISTRY CAUSES YOU

TO QUESTION YOUR

LOVE FOR IT...

It all began April 12, 1990. That is the day that I surrendered my life to full time Christian service. I was fifteen years old sitting in a Youth Conference. I had been contemplating for some time what I was going to do with my life when I graduated high school. From the time that I was little, I remember seeing my Dad and Mom totally sold out to ministering at the church and to other people. We always had new converts or new families over to our house. I was given great examples about how to put others first and to give of yourself in showing the love of Christ to others.

Since that April day, I have not cease to pursue to minister in some capacity. Over the years I have become exposed to the many different sides of ministry. At times I have pondered the thought of second guessing my committment of service years ago. I blindly thought that because you are serving with other God loving Christians that everything will go happily and smoothly. Boy was I in for a rude awakening. The words of a mentor of mine from college echoes in my head very often: "MINISTRY IS PEOPLE.....PEOPLE IS MINISTRY" Wow!! I had to let that one sink in a bit. As long as you are serving with and ministering to sinful, selfish, ignorant, prideful, stubborn, saved by God's grace people; Ministry is going to have its ups and downs.

Why does God choose to use us? Why does he choose to use people like us to carry out His will and ministry? Why does God allow His ministry to be affected by the decisions that we make? At times I must say that my love for ministry has been strained due to the lack of professionlism or lack of organization. So many sold out hardworking servants get stepped on due to being reliable or not knowing how to say no. People are expected to do more than they can because it is ministry. Disorganization, lack of help, unexplained decisions, misuse of people and assests are but a few of the things that are often seen in ministry. Things like this cannot be looked at as acceptable just because it is ministry. All things must be done decently and in order.

At times I think that those in leadership become so focused on the Ministry aspect that they forget to minister and look out for the People invovled. Have you questioned recently why you minister? Have you questioned why you are committed to the ministry? Have you recently sat down and evaluated why you do what you do? Have you considered why you continue serving in an organization(Ministry) that seems to lack as much direction as a horse running wildly without a bridle?

I do not want to come across as someone that is bitter who no longer enjoys or likes the ministry. I am far from that. I love the Ministry with all my heart. I just want to be real and share the fact that at times that does happen. Despite all the inadequacies we have, God still chooses to use us for His honor and glory. Are there ups and downs in ministry? Most definitely! Are there bad decisions made by good God fearing people? Yes! Do people get burned out? Yes! Do people walk away from the ministry? Yes!! Do people at times question why they made the committment they made? Yes!

We must remember this key thought. "MINISTRY IS PEOPLE.....PEOPLE IS MINISTRY." It is not about you, IT IS ALL ABOUT THE GOD IN HEAVEN THAT WE SERVE! Despite all the things that go on and the questions that go unanswered; God's work will carry on. Any ministry that we are a part of or serve in is not ours. It is God's Ministry. Therefore, we should do our best to live and serve in a way that glorifies Him and draws people to Him and not away from Him. Whether we are the ones serving or the ones being served.

I close with this thought from Charles Swindoll:

IF GOD'S WAYS ARE HIGHER THAN OURS........THEN SUBMIT

IF GOD IS IN CONTROL..............THEN OBEY

IF GOD HAS THE ANSWERS I LACK.....................THEN TRUST

THEME OF MY SONG!!

THEME OF MY SONG.....

O God, You are the melody that vibrates from the strings of my heart.

You keep in tune my mind and heart as they coincide in chorus together.

When I lose the joy of my song, You remind me where its note can be found.

When I lose my desire to sing, You refresh me with who you are and I can no longer remain quiet.

You are my song.

You give me reason to sing.

You keep me singing when I find no reason.

You are the song.

You are the music.

You are the words by which the song consist.

May I never quit singing, for in doing so I will conceal that which is music, which is joy.

May what You require of me and who You are, remain as the music that indwells me and drives me to stay in tune with thee.

PEACE IN THE RAIN

PEACE IN THE

RAIN

Walking through this life being showered with pain,

Encouraged by God's Word, there is peace in the rain.

Lost in the flow, burdened by the strain,

Focus on Christ, there is peace in the rain.

Emotions are overwhelming, but then you refrain,

Standing on God's promises, there is peace in the rain.

Actions speak loud and hard to maintain,

Live to please God, there is peace in the rain.

Eyes full of tears, plans have crumbled down the drain,

Prayers lifted up to God, there is peace in the rain.

The race is hard to run, time is like a ball and chain,

Sweet thoughts of heaven, there is peace in the rain.

Knowing God is a precious treasure, having Him is a priceless gain,

When plundered by the storms of life, remember there is peace in the rain.

Can you see me in the sunshine

Can you see me in the rain

I am the God who bares your pain

I am the God who makes the rain

WHAT MUST I DO?

WHAT MUST I

DO?

No sense of direction, am I not moving but standing still,

Holding on to God's promises as I daily seek His will.

What must I do as I linger for his call?

Remembering in my heart that He is my all in all.

O the struggle within my soul to do what is wrong when I know the right,

At times I sadly stumble and give in to the fight.

Softly and tenderly God's voice touches my ears,

Giving me faith for the unknown and putting aside my fears.

What must I do when the answer is not clear,

Shall I turn my back on my God, who is always faithfully near?

Growing closer to my God by His grace I shall stand,

Following after His word, striving to obey His command.

What must I do as I face a brand new day,

Pursuing after peace, leaning on Christ as my stay.

There are many questions that I ponder and answers I do not know,

May I lose not sight of my Jesus who truly loves me so.